As members of our local congregation, it is our responsibility to lift up the weary arms of our leaders so God’s purpose can be fulfilled

My phone rang. It was a corps officer calling to talk about the fact that some members of his congregation were treating him “abusively.” As I listened to his story unfold, his tears were audible. He was broken, and questioned whether he could continue in ministry. Later that same day, I received an e-mail from another officer with the subject line: When officers feel abused.

Both described a litany of verbal attacks on their ministries, their families and their character. Both had been subjected to intimidation, bullying and threats by various corps members and lay leaders. As the territorial abuse advisor, I was appalled and deeply concerned that any person, officer or otherwise, would be on the receiving end of such cruel, mean-spirited treatment. As corps sergeant-major at my own corps, my heart was burdened. I felt saddened that these abusive behaviours would be directed toward any pastor and became more determined to be an encourager and supporter for my own corps officers.

While we often hear about pastors who have abused their pastoral position with members of their congregations, in reality there are many pastors and their families who have endured personal attacks and are wounded in ministry. They often suffer in silence because they are demoralized and don’t feel the situation will change. In fact, there is a great fear that the humiliation and verbal assaults will escalate.

Expectations and Conflict
In The Salvation Army, corps officers are expected to be good at everything. Congregations expect them to be gifted speakers, capable administrators, skilled counsellors, accomplished public relations directors, insightful programmers, qualified maintenance workers, profound theologians and eloquent prayer warriors. They want them to teach, preach, sing, cook, visit the sick, minister to the incarcerated, run the men’s and women’s fellowship groups and manage all the other church ministries. Sadly, corps officers’ families are often neglected. Yet, when things don’t always get done promptly or efficiently, some wonder, “What have our officers been doing with their time?”

Every church experiences occasional personality conflicts and disagreement. But in a growing trend, normal clashes are escalating into bullying or pastoral abuse-often with devastating consequences. Constant criticism, verbal abuse, unrealistic expectations and manipulation are all examples of bullying behaviours. Increasingly, many clergy in every denomination are finding themselves the target of bullying and abuse. Countless ministers of the gospel have become the targets of slander, gossip and the undermining of their ministry by those who fail to give their support.

Many congregations have individuals who want to control everything that happens in the church. Some members, often called “pathological antagonists,” even take pride in making the life of their pastor difficult as they subject him or her to emotional and spiritual abuse. And if this was not enough, there are the passive bystanders who often do even more damage just by sitting back and doing nothing, causing the pastor to feel disappointed and totally alone in the midst of the battle.

Support and Encouragement
Scripture clearly reminds us that no leader can lead without support and encouragement. In Exodus 17:8-16, we read about Israel’s battle against the Amalekites. While Joshua and his troops were fighting in the valley, Moses, Aaron and Hur stood on top of the hill watching. As long as Moses held up his arms and prayed, the Israelites were winning. When Moses’ arms grew tired, Aaron and Hur lifted up his hands so the battle could be won.

This word-picture of Aaron and Hur supporting Moses’ weakened arms is a vivid depiction of pastoral ministry. Every spiritual leader needs to have some Aarons and Hurs in their life. Every pastor needs someone to hold their arms up when they get tired, someone to stand beside them, encourage them and give them a vote of confidence.
God has ordained leadership for the local church. It is time that the body of Christ makes a concerted effort to reach out to injured or hurting ministers who have given their best for God’s Kingdom. This is not to say that our leaders have no faults or shortcomings. But we must be intentional in providing the support and encouragement that they deserve. It is a measure of grace and a sign of a congregation’s spiritual health.

The Apostle Paul called on the church to fulfil its responsibility to their “shepherds”-those called and anointed by God to lead. “Acknowledge those who work hard among you,” he writes, “who care for you in the Lord and who admonish you. Hold them in the highest regard in love because of their work. Live in peace with each other” (1 Thessalonians 5:12-13).
In addition, the writer to the Hebrews says, “Remember your leaders, who spoke the Word of God to you. Consider the outcome of their way of life and imitate their faith” (Hebrews 13:7).

Every leader has the responsibility to lead with integrity, to be gentle, to instruct with clear biblical truth. The emphasis in these passages, however, is on the responsibility of the followers. They are to know their shepherds deeply and respectfully and to value their service. We might disagree with a decision they make, recognize their deficiencies or maybe not even care for their personality-but we’re called to love them anyway.

It’s easy to be indifferent to someone or to be unkind. Yet this type of attitude can be dispelled when we take the time to get to know our leaders and appreciate their unique character. However, nurturing respectful relationships with our leaders requires work, along with plenty of forgiveness, patience, clear communication and, most of all, Christlike love. We are called to make a personal investment by acknowledging our leaders for who they are, respecting their position and having a deep appreciation for what they do. We must always speak honourably and respectfully of them, offering them our highest and best opinion. They are God’s messengers to our souls. We must in turn extend grace to them as our spiritual leaders.
It is no secret that discord and dissension within the church is devastating to the Kingdom of God. Abusive churches are not growing churches. Our corps officers have been given to us as our pastors. As congregational members, we must be committed to upholding them in prayer and through other means of support. It is our responsibility to lift up the weary arms of our leaders so that God’s purpose can be fulfilled.

I hope that one day soon my phone will ring and I will hear an officer say, “I have Aaron and Hur by my side today. We’re going for coffee.”

Practical Support
Here are some practical ways you can support your corps officers in their pastoral role:
Remember them in prayer. Praying for your officers can have a lasting impact on your corps. Pray that God will anoint their preaching, protect their family and renew their passion for Christ. Pray that they will grow in the grace and knowledge of Jesus and be humble, patient, wise and loving.

Offer your help. Use your skills and abilities to bless your corps officers. You may have skills they are lacking. Offer to help whenever possible.

Squelch gossip. If you hear a negative comment about your corps officers, respond with something positive. If misinformation is being spread, correct it with the accurate information. Sometimes silence or just walking away will speak volumes. Don’t talk about your officers in a negative way in front of your children. Help them to have a healthy opinion of their spiritual leaders.

Express your appreciation. Everyone needs encouragement. A note or phone call can quickly lift the burden your officers may be carrying. Limit negative comments and look for a positive aspect of their ministry.
Recognize that they must keep their home life top priority. Like any other Christian parents, corps officers must ensure that their family life is healthy. Healthy families allow for healthy ministry. Too many children of Christian pastors walk away from the faith because they feel abandoned by parents who are too caught up in the challenges of ministry to be present at home.

by Nancy Turley
Territorial Abuse Advisor, THQ Personnel Services